Episode #158: From Military Chaplain to Leadership Coach: Bobby Hulme-Lippert’s Journey

Bobby Hulme-Lippert, a former Army chaplain and the founder of BHL Coaching, discusses the impact of leadership in high-stakes environments. Bobby shares his journey from the military to ministry, emphasizing how both roles taught him the true meaning of leadership: caring deeply for those under his guidance. Through his experiences, Bobby explains how fear and courage are inseparable in leadership, reflecting on his time in the Army post-9/11. He discusses the challenges leaders face, from the burnout of “becoming the role” to the importance of reflection and empathy in guiding others effectively. Bobby’s powerful insights into the healing potential of storytelling and the necessity of slowing down to achieve real progress offer a fresh perspective for leaders at any level. This episode is packed with actionable advice for anyone looking to lead with authenticity and resilience.

Want to learn more about Bobby Hulme-Lippert's work? Check out his website at https://bhl.coach.

Connect with Bobby Hulme-Lippert on LinkedIn at https://www.linkedin.com/in/hulmelippert/.

Key Points with Timestamps

[00:00:30] Introduction to the Leaders and Legacies podcast and today’s guest, Bobby Hulme-Lippert.
[00:03:14] Bobby discusses his shift from Army ROTC to becoming a chaplain after 9/11.
[00:06:00] Craig and Bobby explore fear, courage, and their roles in leadership.
[00:13:18] The power of storytelling in healing and leadership, with insights from Bobby’s experiences with soldiers.
[00:15:12] Discussing the "churn of busy" and the importance of slowing down to gain clarity.
[00:18:13] Comparing military training with leadership skills – the value of a focused, well-aimed shot.
[00:24:19] Why top athletes and professionals benefit from having a coach.
[00:29:00] Bobby’s thoughts on why leaders may hesitate to engage coaches despite clear benefits.
[00:31:00] Signature talks on cultivating belonging and mission alignment in leadership

Transcript

00;00;00;00 - 00;00;30;20
Craig Andrews
I was in a coma for six weeks while the doctors told my wife I was going to die. When I woke up, she told me the most fantastic story. My team kept running the business without me. Freelancers reached out to my team and said, we will do whatever it takes. As long as Craig's in the hospital. I consider that the greatest accomplishment of my career.

00;00;30;23 - 00;00;51;10
Craig Andrews
My name is Craig Andrews and this is the Leaders and Legacies podcast where we talk to leaders creating an impact beyond themselves. At the end of today's interview, I'll tell you how you can be the next leader featured on the show.

00;00;51;10 - 00;01;17;29
Craig Andrews
Today I went welcome Bobby Hulme- Lippert. He is the founder and head of BHL coaching. But Bobby has such an amazing background. A diverse background packed full of leadership. Rose to the top of one profession and then said, you know what? I'm going to do something different. And in Bobby's leadership journey, he was a captain in the U.S. Army.

00;01;17;29 - 00;01;44;28
Craig Andrews
He was a chaplain. And one of the things that we're going to talk about is putting on the robe or becoming the robe, as opposed to the pastor and then business becoming the suit rather than the leader. And so I'm looking forward to this. Something else I should mention. I met Bobby through the local chapter of National Speakers Association.

00;01;44;28 - 00;01;56;20
Craig Andrews
So a skilled and practiced speaker, certainly behind, behind the pulpit, but outside of the pulpit as well. And so I think this is going to be really interesting. Bobby, welcome.

00;01;56;22 - 00;01;59;01
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Thank you. Craig, great to be here. I appreciate it.

00;01;59;03 - 00;02;20;01
Craig Andrews
Yeah. So, obviously, you know, one of the things we were talking about, we you have roots in North Carolina. I have roots in North Carolina. You know, the Marine Corps took me to North Carolina. Did you did you go to the did you go to North Carolina because of the Army, or was it that you got out, got, Davidson College and joined the Army?

00;02;20;03 - 00;02;32;09
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Actually, it was Davidson that brought me to North Carolina, raised in Ohio, but went to Davidson, did Army ROTC there, and had a wonderful experience, in that great state. Still have some family there that that ended up moving.

00;02;32;12 - 00;02;50;16
Craig Andrews
Yeah. And so it's so interesting when people think about joining the Army, it's, usually to carry a gun, not a Bible. So how did you how did why the army? Why a Bible?

00;02;50;18 - 00;03;14;16
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Why, sure. You know, when I, when I got into the Army ROTC, they they were selling leadership development. Hey, what a great way to become a leader. Get in. You know, four years of college, four years as an officer in the army and then go out into the business world or wherever. And you're going to be such a leader, you're going to top notch leadership skills that they sold and my sophomore year, 911 occurred.

00;03;14;19 - 00;03;34;25
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And it was I mean, it was literally overnight that the entire tenor of our our ROTC program changed, let alone, you know, the nation in the world, of course. And and then it really became you are now training to deploy. You are now training for multiple deployments and and and so we're all trying to figure out how are we going to serve, what's it going to look like when we deploy.

00;03;34;25 - 00;03;57;14
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And and for me, I, I had this recognition somehow early on that, that I was strongest when I was helping people connect to maybe stuff they didn't have any other place to go with, but was weighing on them, or was an issue with a another person within themselves, whatever it was. And I was like, I wonder if maybe I'm a I'm a chaplain.

00;03;57;14 - 00;04;13;24
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I'm the kind of guy that creates a different, different space for the harder questions to be asked, the faith questions to be asked. And, and so that's what I did. I leaned into this, this different space than, than all my peers and really came to enjoy that.

00;04;13;26 - 00;04;25;27
Craig Andrews
You know, I'm really curious when 911, you know, because I remember I was I was a forward deployed unit when Saddam Hussein invaded Kuwait back in 1990.

00;04;26;00 - 00;04;26;25
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yep, yep.

00;04;26;27 - 00;04;49;11
Craig Andrews
And, you know, there were a few days where my near future was very much in question. I was in Japan. They ended up deciding to keep us there, to keep North Korea in check. So I eat sushi for the whole war, rather than eating sand. But I'll never forget the feeling of that, of, oh my goodness, we're on the edge of war.

00;04;49;18 - 00;05;03;10
Craig Andrews
I'm active duty military, and I'm a forward deployed unit. I'm curious what did you feel? What did you feel at 911? What were some of the emotions that processed through you?

00;05;03;13 - 00;05;27;07
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I, I felt an incredible amount of fear initially. I wish I could tell you I felt some sort of courage, a brave fear. I felt anger, I felt confusion, I did not understand how people I've never met hated me or would do this, I, I would, I was all over the map. I remember though, the way it got named in our uniforms up until 911.

00;05;27;07 - 00;05;53;14
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
We were allowed to roll our army's sleeves up, which always made you look like you had bigger muscles than you really had. And literally the next day there was no order. Like that said, when we wear a uniform on campus, you are sleeves down. We are a nation at war and I know that sounds like a small thing, but when we put the sleeves down, I felt a different seriousness and it invited a lot of reflection on what what mattered to me and what and what didn't.

00;05;53;16 - 00;06;00;27
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
So beyond the emotions, I found myself to be a more reflective person, trying to really figure out what what meaningful service would look like.

00;06;00;29 - 00;06;20;06
Craig Andrews
Yeah. Well, and you used a couple words there. You said that you had fear, and then you used the word courage. I would argue that courage is a meaningless word in the absence of fear. Courage is what we have when we're filled with fear. It defines how we act.

00;06;20;08 - 00;06;28;05
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
That's right, I love that. And courage is known in the action, in the continuing to to step forward into and through the fear. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I feel that.

00;06;28;07 - 00;06;51;25
Craig Andrews
And I think it doesn't matter whether, you know, you're you're wearing the uniform and you realize your nation is at war or if you're going in to work and you're leading your team and you have some tough decisions. Yes, I would say it's okay to be afraid. I would say somebody who's truly fearless is a stupid person, because there are things in this world that should scare us.

00;06;51;28 - 00;07;06;20
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Aps. Oh, I love that. That's right on. You know, I'm in a local Toastmasters club, and so I see people walk in all the time. First time trying to work on public speaking and the fear is through the roof. And I'll often say the same. Oh, good for you. Because you care. You care enough to feel that.

00;07;06;22 - 00;07;15;18
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And now and now and now the art of this whole thing is to step right through it. That that's courage with the fear. The right there.

00;07;15;21 - 00;07;30;26
Craig Andrews
Yeah, yeah. So. And so you're in ROTC, I presume you had the opportunity to say, you know, maybe the Army's not the thing for me. You had a chance to back out. Is that true? At that point, after your.

00;07;30;26 - 00;07;39;23
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Freshman year, you can do that. Beyond that, you would need to return the full scholarship, which is a generous, generous gift, for sure.

00;07;40;00 - 00;07;42;28
Craig Andrews
And Davidson's a private, private college. That's right.

00;07;43;01 - 00;08;05;08
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
So it's no small amount. So I, you know, that was never really on the radar for me to step away in any serious way. But I did. I did have to think, you know, would I would I serve as, say, the artillery and graduate Davidson and be deployed probably within six months or or go into the chaplaincy.

00;08;05;08 - 00;08;15;05
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And no, you don't get deployed right away. You go to seminary, you study the Bible and theology and ministry and all the rest for three years before you can do anything, which is what I needed.

00;08;15;08 - 00;08;34;03
Craig Andrews
Okay. And so. In that so you did that, and I'm sure he said this, but what what was the motivation? What was the intrigue there to go that route.

00;08;34;06 - 00;09;06;00
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I found that I have a natural ability to connect with a wide range of people. I love the gift of a, a good question or two to, just, to just open up and listen not just to what a person is saying, but listen to all the nonverbal communication and really even help them hear themselves like, and, and, and it becomes such a gift when people start to hear what really matters to them and what they're thinking in the questions of faith, they have the questions of purpose and direction they have, or go on this way or this way, or this relationship challenge.

00;09;06;03 - 00;09;27;09
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And I just found I sat in that space with the gift of a certain kind of presence and questions in a way that people observe. They say, you seem to be good at that. In a way I found very life giving myself. And oh my gosh, the military actually has a way for someone like that to, to to offer that gift and not just sort of put it aside for a few years.

00;09;27;15 - 00;09;47;25
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And it's called the chaplaincy. And actually, as I stepped into it in wartime, I found that it was all the more important with with people dealing with the wide range of, as you know, the things that happen when there's multiple deployments and there's there's injury and there's death and there's there's PTSD and there's relationships that are trying to hold on.

00;09;47;27 - 00;09;53;23
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
It's a lot people ache and need, that kind of space.

00;09;53;26 - 00;10;17;13
Craig Andrews
So. I'm going to throw a curveball at you. And I asked you earlier, I said, is there anything off limits? Yeah, yeah. I remember back when I was in, you know, during the first Gulf War, and again, I'm so thankful that wasn't in theater or not out of fear. You know, I was in the air wing. And so we were always in we were never on the front lines.

00;10;17;13 - 00;10;43;28
Craig Andrews
And that was such a lopsided war anyway. Yeah. But one of the things that really bothered me was they made people take these, pills, anthrax pills, to, And I just thought that was so criminal. It was experimental medicine. And the and, you know, some people develop Gulf War syndrome, and there's, you know, they've never really understood the source of that.

00;10;43;28 - 00;10;59;03
Craig Andrews
There's some question of whether it's whether it was those anthrax pills. And for those that don't know, anthrax is nerve agent. And the thought was, hey, let's let's give our troops a small dose of nerve agent. So if they get hit with a big dose or, you know, their body can fight it off.

00;10;59;06 - 00;10;59;24
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yeah.

00;10;59;27 - 00;11;35;00
Craig Andrews
And so more recently, the troops had been, our military was, you know, demanded to take a vaccine that was still in experimental status. And, you know, and then during the war, we had troops that we put next to burn pits that, you know, have just really hurt them. And one of the challenges in, in leadership is you're put around situations where you really are concerned about the the harm, the unneeded harm being done to people.

00;11;35;02 - 00;11;42;22
Craig Andrews
And I'm just curious, did you encounter any of that in the Army, and how did you process that?

00;11;42;24 - 00;12;11;00
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I have a thought on this. I really did not. I'm sure I did kind of second hand in some of the stories here and there, not in a direct way. What I discovered is that regardless of what people were facing, the, the, the injuries, the experiences, the things they had to do, they would arrive to these moment. I remember we're sitting bedside with this one guy at Brooke Army Medical Center in San Antonio, and he's just describing this firefight, and he's just like it was.

00;12;11;02 - 00;12;28;09
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I couldn't see, I couldn't see, I was just just shooting in the sun was so bright and it was just we just couldn't see. I just knew bullets were coming in and I couldn't see. I couldn't see, and I was just trying to keep moving forward because they said, keep moving forward. And I just I couldn't see. And he's saying this and I go.

00;12;28;11 - 00;12;56;00
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Is that what it feels like right now that you're stepping forward into this unknown and you just feel blind? And tears start streaming down his face and he goes, yes. And this is the first time I discovered that regardless of what people have faced, there is such power, such healing power in knowing how to to tell the story about what they're going through.

00;12;56;07 - 00;13;18;13
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And that's true for leaders across the board. When we discover the story we're going through, however unjust. Wrong, confusing, scary. Once we start to discover a story for ourselves that is true. There is a profound healing available. And that that that nugget I've never lost and I've continued in my my pastoring work, in leadership, coaching and beyond.

00;13;18;15 - 00;13;37;14
Craig Andrews
You know, and that triggers something that I've heard, you know, there's a saying that time heals all wounds. And somebody told me that's that's not true. Care heals wounds. Ooh. And I think that's what you did for that fellow. For that soldier. Yeah.

00;13;37;16 - 00;14;04;20
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I am a big believer that the of of the the insight from, Simon Sinek when he said leadership is not about who's in charge. Leadership is about caring for those in your charge. I think that is actually a fundamental definition to great leadership. Because care does not only heals care, transforms care, upskill up levels. I mean, it's it's profound.

00;14;04;22 - 00;14;24;10
Craig Andrews
Well, then the other thing that jumps out at me is when you ask that question, you know, I see the hallmarks of deep empathy, you know, to connect dots that were not immediately obvious of, you know, he was describing something that happened in another country. Yeah. And your question was, is that what it feels like now?

00;14;24;12 - 00;14;54;16
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yes, yes. And that gosh, that to me seems to be one of the real artistic, almost aspects of of leadership. And I didn't know that was happening then. And that's why I'm such a big believer in leaders finding ways to step back from the crazy, the busy, the to do lists and prioritize space where where they don't have anything but but but some some reflection, whether that's on their own or with 2 or 3 trusted peers.

00;14;54;16 - 00;15;12;27
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Because that gift of being able to connect the dots in spaces that maybe no one saw but are absolutely there, that ends up being everything to an organization. But it's so hard to distill down to an easy bullet point list, and you definitely don't get it when they're just in the churn of busy.

00;15;13;00 - 00;15;29;23
Craig Andrews
Yeah, yeah. Wow. There is so much we could dig into here. Let's talk briefly about the churn of busy. What does that look like? How do you know when you're in it, and what do you need to do?

00;15;29;26 - 00;15;53;15
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Timely, timely question. I find the churn of busy for me. I kind of like it. I feel a heightened sense of go, go, go in my body. And I literally I feel my body rev up. And I think a lot of us do feel the body rev up. I think some common experiences are these to do list that even as we're knocking things off, it's still growing.

00;15;53;15 - 00;16;23;18
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And I think so when we start seeing ourselves show up to our home life or the rest of our life, and we're just basically exhausted, done, numb, or needing to numb out, there are some signs there that we are just churning in the busy realm. And, and again, our bodies letting us know whether it's, really high strung or it's, you know, stomach aches and all those things.

00;16;23;21 - 00;16;52;22
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And the irony of busyness is that we'll actually accomplish far more at a far better level, if we can learn to slow down, if we go in the exact opposite direction, we are confident we need to avoid. I do a lot of my coaching on hiking trails, or at least with folks who are local on purpose, because I know it literally slows both of us to a walking space outside of our normal crazy.

00;16;52;25 - 00;17;16;08
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And and we get out of the woods and all the same to do lists are still there. And yet everything feels expansive. Slowing down actually has an expansive effect on the time we long to have more of. It's the only, only thing I've found that actually has an expansive, ability with with time.

00;17;16;11 - 00;17;42;03
Craig Andrews
Well, and, you know, when I think about the, going back to my marine training, of course, we spend a lot of time training to shoot. And the I mean, I remember drills where it was abundantly clear that the for me to get for me to be the most lethal required for me to slow down the most and take the well-aimed shot.

00;17;42;06 - 00;18;13;14
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yeah, yeah, there is in that reminds me of, you know, Bud Winters, famous track coach from the mid 20th century, coached a number of Olympians in this whole thing, was was all about relaxing. He taught runners how to breathe, just like he had taught fighter players in World War II, to how to breathe so that they regulate themselves into a place of actually deep inner peace and rest, even as they are at their highest level of performance.

00;18;13;14 - 00;18;16;08
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
That is exactly the example.

00;18;16;11 - 00;18;37;06
Craig Andrews
Yeah. So let's start moving forward. You get out of the army and then you become a pastor. Yeah, which seems logical. You went to seminary, you were a chaplain in the Army, and you mentioned this concept of becoming the robe. What was that mean?

00;18;37;08 - 00;19;06;03
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yes, I was a pastor and and loved it. Served three great congregations in Atlanta and then Richmond, Virginia, and in Texas. But there is an aspect of ministry where where folks, you you kind of you want to help people, you want to serve people. You and my case can be a people pleaser too easily. And you start doing becoming all things to all people, and you just get lost trying to do what everybody expects.

00;19;06;03 - 00;19;19;15
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And once you want to be sure that when you preach, you preach, oh, I better have all the right answers. And, and when I, when I lead, I want to do it the right way, the, the way my, my domination says we should do things and everything just feels like I got to do it the way it's supposed to be done.

00;19;19;15 - 00;19;41;26
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And everybody expects it to be done. And and I found I was becoming the robe. I was becoming the symbol of ministry. I was a, you know, perfect pastor to form terms of speech and content and answers and ways of being and showing up when I was supposed to show up. But I was losing Bobby like I was losing myself, trying to be what everybody else wanted.

00;19;42;02 - 00;20;08;10
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And I and I later discovered, my gosh, this this happens in any number of fields as leaders go up the ranks and more and more as expected, it's easy to become the suit or the coat or the robe, the position, and it and lose yourself and the first sign of that, and we get into this is you start to feel an exhaustion that the the vacation alone just isn't, isn't getting away.

00;20;11;07 - 00;20;33;22
Craig Andrews
So the problem. So again you've, you know you've had a lot of the same training I've had you know, and what part of the training that you've had was how to recognize somebody. That's going into a heat illness. And I remember when I was playing soccer in Raleigh back in the 90s, and I remember one Saturday I quit sweating.

00;20;33;25 - 00;21;01;28
Craig Andrews
My brow was dry, my face was I just quit sweating. And it was another eight hours later before I realized I was on the edge of heatstroke. And even though I had that training, I didn't recognize the signs in the moment. And so let's talk about this. You're feeling that exhaustion. You know, I can picture people saying, well, I feel exhausted a lot, but it's hard to self-diagnose when you're in the moment.

00;21;01;28 - 00;21;22;29
Craig Andrews
If I had a coach watching me play soccer, he was like, Craig, you're not sweating. Come here. Yeah, you're coming off the field. You're coming off the field now. Yeah. I mean, it's it's like we need a coach in our lives to help us see this.

00;21;23;02 - 00;21;44;00
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
That is like, what a great example. Yeah. We can't we can't read our own label when we're inside the bottle of of ourselves. And you're right. I could not see for all of my incredible training and ministry and continuing training, I did all kinds of continuing ed as a pastor. I couldn't see, the signs of exhaustion.

00;21;44;02 - 00;22;05;01
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I couldn't I couldn't see the way the ache in my stomach that just wouldn't go away was was not just, maybe I gotta eat healthier. I was eating all right. I get exercise more. I was exercising, eating. I couldn't listen to to my body. And the body never lies. Telling me something's off. In my case, I was hiding.

00;22;05;01 - 00;22;26;07
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I was trying to be what everyone needed me to be, and I just. I wasn't free to to be Bobby and offer my gifts in a truly full, genuine way. So you're right. We do need others coaches and others who. Who know us and who can see. Hey, the signs are there. You're not seeing it. They're absolutely there.

00;22;26;14 - 00;22;27;13
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yeah.

00;22;27;15 - 00;22;52;11
Craig Andrews
Yeah. I mean, for me, in that soccer game, the adrenaline was pumping and I knew I was thirsty. Fortunately, eventually I saw some water back by the goal and that doused in my head and took a drink. And I was driving. Around eight hours later, I realized, oh, crap, things almost got serious for me, man. Yeah, but I wish I'd had a coach that was watching this.

00;22;52;13 - 00;23;13;04
Craig Andrews
That was in my life. And I think one of the challenges that business owners have, you know, there's there's a little bit of ego if you go into business for yourself, there's a little bit of an ego. And part of that ego says, why figure this out on my own? I always think about Michael Jordan, one of the best athletes of history.

00;23;13;06 - 00;23;17;14
Craig Andrews
Yeah, he didn't have one coach. That guy had multiple coaches.

00;23;17;17 - 00;23;40;09
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yes. Yeah. It's remarkable that these these top athletes, and for a long time it's been athletes that we think of athletes and coaches. But I love there was an article in 2010, 2011, in The New Yorker by a surgeon who began asking the question, why don't other professions that care about excellence have coaches? He's like, I've been doing surgery for years.

00;23;40;09 - 00;23;59;12
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
No one's ever coached me. They called me an expert once I finished residency, and that's been that. And it was a beautiful exploration. And now the industry has evolved a lot as people are aware, like, yeah, if I want to know excellence in what I want to do and I want to serve people, truly serve people, so I'm not burning out because I'm just trying to cover down.

00;23;59;12 - 00;24;19;18
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I want someone to see when I need the water. I would be wise to pursue that excellence alongside somebody else. And so that was kind of a watershed moment when that surgeon in that article and some other field started recognizing what the pursuit of excellence could look like in ways that mirrored the Michael Jordan's of the world.

00;24;19;21 - 00;24;31;20
Craig Andrews
So I love the question that you asked that soldier. Yeah. Is that what you feel now in your coaching? What are some questions that you ask that have similar impact?

00;24;31;22 - 00;24;53;01
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yes. So I am often my coaching is very contextual. I'm often listening for some of the key words and metaphor. Someone is is sharing. So that I can offer that kind of of question. I sometimes will ask, you know, I had someone talking about how that they love skiing and they're talking about, in a way, they have a passion that they don't get to do it enough.

00;24;53;01 - 00;25;13;08
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And but they were trying to make a business decision between the one with this bigger company that felt safe and secure, this more entrepreneur route that felt scary but more exciting. And and eventually I just said, you know what? What's it look like to go to go down this, this black diamond? What's what's the next what's the next gate?

00;25;13;08 - 00;25;28;28
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
What's it feel like to be on the edge of your skis in a way that feels scary, but alive and and somehow framing the word by way of skiing for this particular client, that the fear from skiing runs deep was just the right way to think about the whole challenge. Yeah, I want to be on the edge of my skis.

00;25;29;03 - 00;25;52;07
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
What's that mean right now? What's the turn? And we build a strategy, literally a strategy based on going down a black diamond. But that was true to him, right? That's not going to be for everybody. Sometimes I like to ask people creative questions because they're not used to that. They're not used to being asked if your life were made into a film, what are the three scenes that would have to be in that film from for me to really understand you?

00;25;52;09 - 00;26;13;18
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And I love those questions that have people pause for a moment and they have to think a little bit more creatively, because they get to go a different place in their brain. They get to go more into that right brain that doesn't get used a lot. That's super creative and super generative, and the one that actually can move the ball forward, with, with the most amount of power.

00;26;13;20 - 00;26;18;13
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And, and so I like questions that invite that of, of folks.

00;26;18;15 - 00;26;19;22
Craig Andrews
Yeah.

00;26;19;25 - 00;26;26;05
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And then they can write the fourth scene of the movie that they want to live, which is always fun.

00;26;26;07 - 00;26;45;16
Craig Andrews
Well, and I just think about, you know, I'll go back to that soccer game. If I'd had a coach on the side of the field said, hey, Craig, we're going to pull you for five minutes, get you hydrated. I, I'm pretty sure I would have performed at a higher level, hydrated than I was performing dehydration.

00;26;45;18 - 00;27;10;14
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yeah. That's right, that's right. We we, you know, leadership's about caring for the people entrusted to our charge. We're also entrusted to our charge. And when we when we give ourselves that, that genuine care and we are growing and we are covering down on, on on the self-care that's vitalizing to us what cash we serve, everybody we serve, our soccer team.

00;27;10;16 - 00;27;15;23
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
We serve everyone way better with a with a wholly different kind of energy.

00;27;15;25 - 00;27;28;10
Craig Andrews
Yeah. From from your angle. What what are the top reasons that you think leaders don't bring coaches into their lives?

00;27;28;13 - 00;27;52;21
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I think there is a little bit of a, of a stigma about, needing help. I think there's a little bit of a sense sometimes, that. Well, that's a that's a nice luxury. And yeah, for the big corporations that give their all their executives a coach. But that's kind of a, a nice aside. It's, it can sometimes be difficult at first to see how fundamental it can be.

00;27;52;23 - 00;28;18;25
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And that especially when times feel like they're going to be lean or unknown or you got to cut costs without thinking, what if one of the most cost saving things were with someone who could help me distill down to the fundamentals of what really matter and, and and move from a place of empowerment that is that is pulling from a deeper well than, than anything else I've got.

00;28;18;25 - 00;28;43;07
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I mean, there's a sense that coaching at its best can streamline everything, but but at first it doesn't look like that. It looks like a nice benefit, a nice bonus, maybe a little stigma about needing help. Are some of the the initial pieces and then I'll say, you know, trust it's a relationship. Business is relationships, right? We go back to the people we know and trust over the years.

00;28;43;09 - 00;29;03;03
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And and a coaching relationship is definitely about trust. And so people want to feel that sense of of safety. Okay. You really can't help me get where I'm going. And that doesn't usually happen in just a quick exchange. It's not like it's selling a, you know, a simple product right here. And back. And we're done. It's it's more complex than that.

00;29;03;03 - 00;29;05;26
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
It involves a lot a lot of trust building. Yeah.

00;29;05;29 - 00;29;30;21
Craig Andrews
Yeah, yeah. Well, I wish we could go. We're just there's so much to dig into, but we need to go ahead and, wrap this up with one thing I. So you do a lot of coaching, but you also do public speaking. What's, you know, what's 1 or 2 of your signature talks? What do those cover?

00;29;30;24 - 00;29;50;06
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
You know, we we live in an age where we know we're in this epidemic of loneliness and isolation. We have a lot of anxiety about about, hey, I, and and there's a, there's a lot of just sense of disconnect within ourselves and with one another. And all those pieces are in the air. And so probably one of my favorite, I always speak on leadership.

00;29;50;09 - 00;30;14;26
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
One of my favorite ones is on leadership and belonging and how you how leaders can cultivate a genuine sense of connection with their people and among their people. Because the studies show that when an organization, when the people involved in organization have a deep sense of belonging, like they really connect to the others there and to the mission, the business growth is, is just stunning.

00;30;14;28 - 00;30;32;19
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
And I love there was a great article about this in the Harvard Business Review just a couple years ago, how big it is. And so I love to just double and triple down on the human skills of how to cultivate belonging and to help people, even in that that's digging itself. Discover, discover a glimpse of what that looks like, what that feels like.

00;30;32;21 - 00;31;00;19
Craig Andrews
Well, and I would imagine, you know, with your, your time in the army, your experience in the army, that gives. I know for me, you know, the whole concept of mission over the individual, you know, that I'm getting everybody, you know, in the Marine Corps, everybody gets aligned behind the mission. The mission comes becomes before the individual. And I imagine that's something with your background that ties into your signature talk.

00;31;00;21 - 00;31;29;02
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That that is the exciting part of of discovering that alignment. And and I love a lot of times I'll pair my, my, my speaking with workshops that help the help teams kind of do some of their goals vision, setting a goal setting together so that that mission feels like it's not one person saying, here is the mission, when in fact, here is a team that feels like they all have agency and voice around that which at the end of the day, always proves more generative way.

00;31;29;04 - 00;31;30;25
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
But absolutely. Yeah.

00;31;30;27 - 00;31;46;12
Craig Andrews
Absolutely. Well, Bobby, this is, been absolutely great. How do people reaches so if somebody is interested in coaching or booking in for a keynote or just shoot, shoot in the breeze, how do people reach out to you?

00;31;46;15 - 00;31;55;16
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
I love it all. It really you can find everything about me on on my website BHL that's those are my initials. But dot coach.

00;31;55;19 - 00;32;00;13
Craig Andrews
Okay, well hey thanks for sharing this on leaders and legacies. It's been fascinating.

00;32;00;15 - 00;32;05;09
Bobby Hulme-Lippert
Craig. This has been a lot of fun. Thank you so much.

00;32;05;09 - 00;32;34;05
Craig Andrews
This is Craig Andrews. I want to thank you for listening to the Leaders and Legacies podcast. We're looking for leaders to share how they're making the impact beyond themselves. If that's you, please go to Alize for me.com/guest and sign up there. If you got something out of this interview, we would love you to share this episode on social media.

00;32;34;07 - 00;32;57;17
Craig Andrews
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00;32;57;19 - 00;35;08;05
Craig Andrews
Please go ahead and subscribe your thumbs up! Ratings and reviews go a long way to help promote the show. It means a lot to me. It means a lot to my team. If you want to know more, please go to Alize for me.com. or follow me on LinkedIn. Thanks for listening. We'll see you next time.